Rediscovering Eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am Yours
dailies
Friday, November 14, 2008
Happy 5th month =P.
-10:04 PM
I had 推拿见习 this morning and guess what happened? I fainted. Its my 2nd time I've fainted in my whole life..first time was in Pri 2 during assembly. THe teacher thought that I had fainted because I was afraid of needles..but that isnt true! I had felt that the room was really stuffy..all the windows and the doors were closed and the heater was on and i was standing in front of the heater, with one layer of long johns, sweater, jeans, and my white coat and boots.
It all happened within 10secs? I felt that I was losing my vision, everything was becoming grey (the room wasnt spinning though),then i began to see small white spots and I knew i was going to faint soon. I quickly turned to Amanda and told her and she held onto me and asked if i was okay. Everyone heard her and realise I was fainting, or rather, had fainted. I made it to the bed before everything turned black. Laid down and the moment i did so, my vision came back again. I wanted to sit up and see what the doc was doing but my friends told me go lie back down. After 2 mins, I got up again cos i wanted to see the patient's X-ray slides. THe doctor asked if I had low BP or blood sugar level but I dont. I laid down again after 10 mins cos i felt dizzy again.
THis time the doc came and took my pulse and asked if I had any history of fainting which I dont. He couldnt feel my pulse though he touched my whole hand to find out if I had those Xie2 Fei1 Mai4 which is at a different location from majority of the people. When he realise i didnt have a pulse, he touched my neck and pressed a few acu-points and they were painful. I didnt react or give any form of indication that it was painful cos i didn want him to 扳 my head. 扳 means to move one's part of the body to its maximum and then give it another tug to loosen that area of the body. No way did i want that on my neck. But to my dismay, he knew that there was something wrong with my neck and did so anyway. THe seconds towards the 扳 was traumatising cause I knew he was going to do it cos he was preparing my neck and getting into momentum and there was nothing I could do about it. My whole body stiffened momentarily. He did so when I was least prepared that I got a shock and gave a yelp, had tears rolling down my cheeks and was hyper-ventilating a little. It wasn painful but the shock was... When he pulled my neck, I felt that my whole spinal cord actually moved upwards. And I knew he had to pull my head in the other direction to balance up and my whole body stiffened though everyone told me to relax. I gave a yelp and had tears too when he did it again. He is quite good though...very fast and actually my neck felt better after everything.
Apparently, i have a slightly crooked spinal cord at the neck area..most people probably have it nowadays..and that suppressed part of a blood vessel and thus reduced the blood flow to my brain. I was quite shock to hear that cos from young, my spine has been ok..most ppl say i walk with a straight back..the only person tt din think so was my dad cos he has seen my posture when i study and its not too good. Oh wells..should have listened..now how? =(.I didn realise tt when i tilt my head towards the left, i felt resistance and I've nv noticed tt before when I did PE in JC. This prob build up in Uni where I did minimal exercise and maximal study because of my coursework. Sigh..THe doc got me to go walk around for a while before joining the group again. He stills think I am afraid of needles though..-.-..and like I've seen a caesarian and spinal cord surgery can..
I tried to tilt my head to the left for 15 mins in an attempt to try to correct the spinal cord and everyone laughed. Spinal cords are not corrected this way. Oh wells, i really hope my spinal cord becomes straight again..I dunno how..but i pray it happens..I dun wanna faint on the road..
Today is my 5th month with N. Yay! Both our birthdays are in Nov. Hee. I thank God for placing him in my life and supporting me in many ways esp now when I am in this foreign land and having to cope with many issues. I thank him for tolerating my nonsense too..heez..Couldn't have made it without you dear..=)
