Rediscovering Eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am Yours
dailies
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Ntucf FOC 06/07-25-28 july@Changi Aloha
-2:24 PM
FOC has ended. My group, HOpE won!!Yay..hees..
Before the camp, I was approached to be group leader and to play keyboard for the camp. Playing keyboard is okay coz i have played in various different settings before but group leader was a no-no, coz I wasnt sure how to lead the group. I am not the kind of person that talks a lot(but my group obviously thinks otherwise) so I was afraid that I wouldn be able to effectively facilitate the gelling and sharing amongst the freshmen. So, for some nites before the camp, I prayed about it. On the first day, all of us met at Pasir Ris station control at 12 and being me, I was late. I reached at 12.15. Even Grace, my MEET team leader from vcf who crashed the FOC was "amazed" by me. Haha. In the beginning, the girls stuck to the girls and the guys were by themselves and so, I thought that I had better sit in the middle area when we ate lunch at Macs. So, did intros and made small talk with each of them. Grace and I bought happy meal!!!hee..After that, all of us set off for Exodus to the Promised Land which is an Amazing race kind of game. The station games were simple but fun, but it was really the company that all of us enjoyed the most. Many of the freshies had come to the camp with preconceived ideas of cf but i guess, most of them have changed for the better.
My group, i must say, really gelled well and we had no problems sharing even things deep within ourselves. I really valued and treasure those coz its hard to get ppl to share things so deep but it was so amazing that the trust established in jus hours in the group could make that happen. Looking back at my own life, I realised that all my problems and issues that I had particularly in my transition from JC to first year uni occurred for a purpose. During the camp, I was able to share so many thoughts with regards to their concerns and problems. Prior to this, it has never occurred to me that what I went thru could actually happen to other people. When they shared, i could really feel for them and that was precious to me coz it made my sharing more applicable to them. When i had those problems then, nobody could understand me and part of the reason was that i din noe how to verbalise and put into words how i was feeling. Only one friend could understand to some extent but that was abt it. Now when i look at the freshies with their problems, I finally understood why God made me go thru those situations, situations which i felt comfortable enough to tell only God. When i first started off in a cg in uni, i couldn verbalise what i felt and sometimes i din feel the same way others did, so i made "blunders". I wasn eloquent in my speech too. In my group, there was this guy Alvin who had the same problem and I had this urge to just help him to have the boldness to start sharing coz the way i got over my lack of eloquence was the practice in putting my thoughts into speech. I din want him to be like me who for some time din dare to speak much during cgs. Indeed, its only when you yourslef go thru such situations, do you really understand how someone else in the same situation feels. Hah..and mayb because of my startings, i could understand what he intended to mean although his speech said something a little off tangent.
Also, during one of the sharing sessions, a verse: Isaiah 55:8,9 came to my head. For the first time, i actually felt that God gave me a verse to encourage my freshies. Its interesting that one of them had a problem with pride and another, had failed to get into Law, a course she had wanted. For the latter, although she said "Let Your will be done", she din actually mean it. And i thought to myself, how interesting. I was like a cross or a hybrid between the two of them cos it was my failure to get into Med that dealt with my pride and I had said the exact same words my freshie had said, which i din actually mean. It felt as if, God had placed me as their leader or had placed them into my group for a purpose. As they shared, the Isaiah verse came so strongly into my head and I think it really impacted the two of them, especially Jim. For that sec, I kind of thank God that I had actually failed in certain areas, so that I could go through the experience to be better used by Him to help others.
Being in an interdenominational organisation exposed me to the different ways other denominations worked as well as their principles. And i think its interesting and great that the committee worked well together.
There were other presentations like the MEET presentation which I did and I thank God that I din feel as if I was going to faint any moment but that everything went smoothly. I thank Him for experiences that I could share with people. Thank Him for loosening my tongue to be able to speak forth words of edification to Him and be able now, after one year, to form sentences that actually bring forth what my feelings and thoughts intend. Indeed prayers work wonders and I believe it was the prayers I had done nites before the camp that helped me and the group.
Now I am arrowed to do CCA booth...hmms...haha..okays..hmms..
First night slept at 1am.
Second night 3 am.
Third night 5am.
Its the first time I actually stayed awake the whole night. LIke really FIRST time.
